Car F*!#ers (or “Saved by the Bell-Enders”)

Swedish Glans and Meat Balls

This is an educational post. You learn some anatomy terms,  and what constitutes practical jokes in Sweden. However, if you are a Swedish police officer, you may want to refrain from such jokes (or at least stop blogging about it).

From the good people at The Local (Sweden’s News in English):

The practice of bell-ending, or ollning, involves a man touching an object with his glans and has established itself as a recurring form of practical joke in Sweden. The term comes from ollon, the Swedish word for glans.

You know, you’re at a bar with your buddies, and one goes to the bathroom, so a funny joke is to dip your penis tip in their beer! Or rub it up against something, like an iPhone.

Swedish Police officials are investigating claims by an anonymous police officer blogging under the name “Farbror Blå” (Uncle Blue) that he and a fellow male officer rubbed their dinky tips on the door handles, window buttons, gear stick, steering wheel, stereo buttons and the police radio buttons, (as well as the receiver used to talk) of the squad car of their female co-workers! Fun! Especially when they let the females know what they did!

Further blog posts included details of how he shook hands with a man who had just hanged himself, provoking guffaws from his colleagues. He also claimed it felt “damn good” to punch somebody in the mouth.

But the Swedish Police are on the case:

Having read the blog, Mårten Unbeck, chief legal official with the police in Skåne county, quickly decided to hand the matter over to a prosecutor at the police’s internal investigations unit.

April 1st is fast approaching, so if you are looking for a unique practical joke to play on your friends, secretly hump their car in every auto-orifice you can!

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